Last night I wondered briefly if it was all worth it as I scouted through tall itchy grass at the end of a long day, looking for Spotlight's grazing muzzle that he manages to remove only when his face is wet from a rain shower. In the farthest corner of the field I find the muzzle freshly pooped on by Spotlight himself in attempts to either conceal it or express his hatred of it.
How do we give so much of our time and energy to other living beings and have it be worth it, especially when they can up and die on you in any given moment? Is it a fair trade what we get back? Is it life hours well spent or used up? The fresh news of Pegasus having melanoma adding to my worry.
Back in the barn to hose the muzzle, I see Sage in her Ariat polo chasing toads under a wheelbarrow. My heart swells a bit at the simplicity of the site and I'm just so in love with her. I send her down to get the sheep on her own and what felt like 30 minutes later I look down to check and see sheep loose in the pasture and Sage walking slowly across the arena. A wild hare darts away from her and her shoulders slump in resignation that catching her own rabbit (she's determined to make pets of the entire animal kingdom) isn't going to happen tonight. She turns her attention back out to the sheep and brings them in for me.
"I couldn't catch it Mom," she goes to console herself in Czech's muzzle and he is all too happy to share his wet grain mash with her hair.
With all the pain and heartache that comes from working with animals, these pieces of heaven are what they give us in return. They might not happen too often but I can't imagine finding them any other way for me.
Out on the Battlefields with Czech, chasing deer and ghosts.
Spotlight hauling around his boys during morning chores.
Pegasus, a living breathing little girl's dream.
Bandon being my best friend and partner through everything we learn together.
It's completely worth the sleepless nights and fretting over a missed meal or a strange bump. The saying goodbye pain that eventually comes whether or not you are ready for it. It's worth it for right now. For this sunset on this day, I'll take it.
My kids are catching on to this equine happiness lifestyle too, recently we took them to Kentucky for my oldest son, Hunter's, archery tournament. On day two in Louisville we had free time and went to Churchill Downs (of course).
They were being kids and honestly wearing on my nerves as I tried to keep track of and peace between them. As the horses came out, some began to get interested.
As the race went by, I was worn out and sure the day was a bust when the kids turned around and said that was the coolest thing they had ever seen.
Next day at The Horse Park in Lexington, we all experienced our first carriage ride. Never sure of how companies take care of horses, I'd never paid for a ride before and we all closed our eyes to listed to the Suffolk Punch teams hoofbeats fall as we traveled smoothly in the breeze they created.
They met horse breeds they had only seen in their posters. They couldn't grasp who Secretariat was (even though they've seen the movie and I've told the stories) but a Marwari was an occassion.
It was an experience I wouldn't trade for the world and just as large to me as watching Sage with the toad, them discovering their own heart swells.
I'm looking forward to summer break beginning in a few days, though it means less riding for me on my own horses, it means lots more time with my kids who are now old enough for me to let go a bit so they can discover what a farm means to them personally.
I'm also excited about regular help with their sheep...
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